As a kid, I liked the idea of journaling, but never really caught on to it. I tried writing some of the day’s events in my abundant supply of Sanrio diaries (with the little lock and key- I’m not sure why I received so many of these as gifts). Inevitably, I would forget about it after a few days.
That changed when I met my first boyfriend- sophomore year of high school. I suddenly had feelings I couldn’t contain within myself. I grabbed a spiral notebook (red) and a pen (black), and desperately dumped my thoughts on paper.
Since then, writing and journaling has been a part of my life. Sometimes I write more, sometimes less, but there is always an active journal in my vicinity.
I’m not picky, but I most often use a composition book with a black pen. It’s cheap and accessible, and makes me feel like I can write without conserving fancy materials. I like the act of writing by hand- I don’t get the same satisfaction from typing.
1. Process feelings and experiences
I get easily overwhelmed by big feelings. When I am overwhelmed, I can’t articulate my thoughts well, or think clearly. Writing forces me to slow my thoughts to the pace of my writing, and helps me sort through a tangle of emotions.
Often, I won’t even be able to identify what or why I’m feeling a certain way until I’ve spent time writing. Then when I do, I have a feeling of release. I make some big sighs, exhaling deeply. My head feels less pressure from the inside. My chest feels lighter.
2. Have and develop ideas
The first audience for most of my ideas is my journal. The paper never criticizes me!
Periodically, I dedicate time specifically to generating ideas. Try it! Come up with ideas for a determined length of time. Resist the urge to Google this or that, or dismiss something because it’s weird. Just write ideas- no interruptions, no filters, until the time is up.
Once I move beyond the obvious, things get really interesting and creative. It’s a great exercise that gets my mind moving in fresh directions.
3. Task management
I’m one of those people that gets a lot of satisfaction from physically crossing things off lists. So my journal houses various to-do lists. Tasks to be done on my website, people to email, music to listen to, what to practice, etc.
I can keep track of a lot in my head, but when things get busy, it calms me to see things in a list. Then I make a plan of attack. Usually, I knock out the quickest ones first to get some momentum going.
4. Brain dump
This is another writing/mental exercise I use when I feel stuck. With a brain dump, I write anything that comes to mind- stream of consciousness. It could be mundane details of my day, or random thoughts or observations. Again, no filter, and no judgment.
Writing down a thought or memory allows my mind to release it. Once safely preserved on paper, my brain feels free to move on. This works great for the kinds of thoughts that bounce around my head incessantly.
It’s funny that some of those repetitive thoughts will plague me, on loop, for several days. But if I go back later and review what I’ve written, I’ll have almost forgotten I ever had the thought.
5. Track progress
I often make an intention to adjust a habit, try something new, or to focus on something. Along the way, I make notes in my journal about what I am doing, how things are going, how I feel about it, etc.
This helps me have a broader perspective on my self-evolution. It’s hard to compare my current state with myself even just a few weeks ago without a reference point. I get so consumed with where I am in the moment. This can be a good quality, but it can also start to feel like I am going nowhere.
Every so often, I flip back to the earlier part of my journal, reviewing what I’ve written previously. When I revisit the mind of my former selves, I get a sense of the growth I’ve experienced.
6. Preservation of memory
As you can imagine, after writing habitually for years, I had a large box filled with used journals. This started to feel like a liability. I didn’t really want anyone reading them, and a lot of what I’d written made me cringe, years later.
At one point, I burned all of my old journals in a bonfire at our house, and it was very liberating. Now, I keep just a few of my recent ones, and dispose of them after a while.
Though I don’t keep the physical item, writing down the details of an experience etches it into my memory more deeply. Additionally, when I reread what I’ve written, I further reinforce the memory.
Final thoughts
Until recently, I never really thought of myself as a “writer.” I didn’t put the label on myself, but technically I was writing- a lot.
It wasn’t until Robert told me he liked the way I wrote (on my first blog, over 10 years ago) that I even considered it a skill I could develop.
In a way, my blog has become a professional diary/journal, where I share my experiences and thoughts on developing my music career. When I was really interested in orchestra auditions, I had a hard time finding information about what that experience was like- the real deal.
It has been incredibly rewarding to be told by other musicians that I was able to articulate their own thoughts and feelings about career/music/art.
I do think it all started with just me and my journals, scratching away on paper.
Alyse Hokamp 